Noelle Nicolls

What an amazing weekend celebrating the spirit of a man we knew as Kirk Steele for a time and a space. We all remember him, release him and cherish him in our own way, but his spirit remains the same: one with all that is. Giving thanks to the universe for continuously blessing me with great African men.

The pain doesn't sting anymore. It inspires. I was greeted in peace by the ancestors in the land of wood and water. I feel at home once again.

"Once you've seen the face of god, you see that same face on everyone you meet." 365 Tao by Deng Ming-Dao

Tomorrow I make the trod to Jamaica for the first time since I lost my love and lost myself; for the first time since I was reborn, refreshed and renewed.

So much has transpired this year, much of which I shared intimately with friends, family and strangers on this memoir. But there are memories I shared with few or none; secrets known only by the divine powers.

African spiritual teacher Sobonfu Some speaks about the spirit that is created in intimate relationships called "the spirit of intimacy". This spirit represents the union of two beings; an extension of their own spirits. When Steele transitioned, the spirit uniting the both of us had a powerful pull on me. It lingered for most of the year waiting anxiously for me to renew my commitment to life and reassign it a purpose.

For most of the time I lingered too, residing comfortably in the twilight zone, between the world of the living and the dead. There was a constant tug-o-war between the part of me that was connected to Steele in his new realm and the part of me connected to the world of the living.

By the sheer power of my intuition, the support of my family, the guidance of the ancestors, the sacred feminine energy of Yeye Oshun and the divine will of the mother and father of creation, the spirit of intimacy created by the union of Steele and I has been appeased. I am this moment, a place where darkness no longer encloses, but light radiates from the depths of my soul.

MY MOTHER always told me, 'a wise man can't reason away what a fool believes', so I have little faith my analysis will change the opinions of those afflicted with the ignorance virus, as it relates to the current debate about spousal rape.

I do hope those who are more informed and simply afflicted with a severe case of spinelessness will stop to think again about the impact their cowardice will have on victims of one of the most heinous crimes.

Victims of rape are not fantasies of the public's imagination; they are real people, as the woman who wrote about her ordeal in The Tribune last year testifies.

"When he forced himself on me he would say he paid for the right to have sex with me whenever he wanted. Many times I was left bruised and sore for days.. On two occasions I even contracted sexually transmitted diseases. He was a chronic "sweethearter" even to relations with a baby-sitter and a maid. The man made my life a nightmare and because of his abuse I often took it out on the children," she said.

"I often felt dirty, disgusted, hopeless and not in control of my own body. Since leaving nineteen years ago, I have not had a relationship with any other man -- scars are too deep. I vowed never to have to go through that kind of sexual abuse ever again! Thank you, Mrs Turner, for paving the way for women to have recourse and to be allowed to have control over their own bodies. I am sure a lot of women appreciate it," she said.

With the Government's decision to kill the bill proposed to amend to the Sexual Offences and Domestic Violence Act, 1991 to extend protection against rape to married women, they have abandoned all of those women suffering in silence, like the one above. They have abandoned their so called progressive agenda; they have opted to represent those that oppress rather than those that are oppressed. According to a 2007 joint report of the United Nations and the World Bank, the Bahamas has the highest per capita rate of rape; not only in the region or the hemisphere, but in the world.

Last week, the Minister of State for Social Development Loretta Butler-Turner revealed the government has no intention of reintroducing the proposed amendments to the Sexual Offences Act when parliament is reconvened. The bill was dropped off the legislative agenda with the prorogation of Parliament last week.

(As published in The Tribune newspaper by staff reporter Noelle Nicolls, on Monday, March 15, 2010)

MANY times in life we are confronted with the truth that ignorance is bliss.

But less we become too blind to our own self-destructive ways, let us not forget that "when you're dumb, you're dangerous".

A truth all too uncomfortable to accept is the fact that neither the abolition of slavery, majority rule, independence, civil rights, nor Christianization, restored the humanity, identity, position of power or culture of African people, now dispersed around the globe.

In the Bahamas, immigration officers regularly conduct raids on the Haitian community at job sites in the early morning, or bus stops in the mid afternoon. When a Haitian child returns home from school to a vandalized and empty house, what sort of humanity is there to speak of for that child? This is the unspoken reality of disempowered African people, in this instance Haitians in the Bahamas. Parents deported to Haiti with no consideration for their children. Children abandoned by the State, many times left to wonder the streets until a relative or community member absorbs them into the family.

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